Hi guys! Believe it or not, there are actually haters out there for Organic Liaison already. Actually I don't think it is just Organic Liaison, I think it is just anyone who thinks differently from him. So let me address him and anyone that is hating on people choosing to live in their own way.
Here it goes, first of all, this guy is on Twitter and his twitter name or whatever begins with URNOT...well, who the F%&# are you? You don't flippin' know me or anyone else you don't live with or in their skin so right there tells me...Nimrod, right? He asks me why I chose Organic Liaison...then I looked at his Twitter page...let me say this, I don't really get Twitter, I am a self professed hermit, like my crab...I don't get out much and I don't bother anyone and I certainly don't get on a soap box much...until lately, must be an ascending moon or something. Anyway, his page has all this stuff about fitness and what things are good or bad for us blah, blah, blah...which ok, that's nice, but it is all hater stuff like who is wrong about stuff. Who the f^&%$ cares? You know, diversity is where it's at man. I am just minding my own business and you Tweet at me and start up with this stuff...on his page he writes...no one from Organic Liaison is wanting to stand behind the product and no one that is using it is speaking up about why they use it. He says they won't put their "science" on the website and are very vague.
Well here it is Granola (fruit, flake, and nut) and I won't be vague. I decided to go with Kirstie Alley's plan, Organic Liaison, because of it's founder and the energy that it is presented. Look, is it the perfect diet? I don't know. What I do know is the website is really a lot of fun and Kirstie is friggin' hilarious and she is real. I identify with her because I am a single mother of two, I was skinny, now I am fat, I want to lose weight and I want it to be fun and interesting. So far from what I have witnessed with Phitter (Kirstie's Twitter for OL fans), her tweets, her interviews, Kirstie is very down to earth. She is doing something she believes in and this program speaks to me. So in lieu of drinking 2- 2 liters of pepsi and eating fast food at least 4 times a week, I am getting excited about drinking an elixir in a cool looking bottle and eating organic foods. I don't care if it is food coloring in that elixir and talc in the mixes...I am excited about eating real food for once and exercising and some guy in a I -think- I- am -super sexy athlete costume and a hater attitude didn't get me there, Organic Liaison and Kirstie Alley did....so suck it Mr Hater and anyone else like him. Leave me the hell alone and I will do you the same favor....Goodnight my loves, Love you!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
10 Reasons Why I Don't Want To Be Fat
I have been thinking about my fat and contemplating my situation for some time now. I have come up with a list. 10 Reasons I don't Want To Be Fat
1. When you are fat sex is not as much fun.
2. I can't paint my own toenails.
3. We already talked about grooming the nether regions.
4. Can't run without injury.
5. Being naked is no longer enjoyable (I used to love being naked)
6. I have to wear a bra (34b said I didn't have to if I didn't want too.)
7. When you act flirty with someone they look at you like you have 3 heads.
8. It's always hot.
9. I can't breathe, ever.
10. My face looks like Violet after she chewed the gum in Willy Wonka.
1. When you are fat sex is not as much fun.
2. I can't paint my own toenails.
3. We already talked about grooming the nether regions.
4. Can't run without injury.
5. Being naked is no longer enjoyable (I used to love being naked)
6. I have to wear a bra (34b said I didn't have to if I didn't want too.)
7. When you act flirty with someone they look at you like you have 3 heads.
8. It's always hot.
9. I can't breathe, ever.
10. My face looks like Violet after she chewed the gum in Willy Wonka.
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
My No Fat-Sex Rule Sucks....
I made a rule, yes, I did. Tisha does not have fat sex. I mean if I wouldn't date me why would I let some poor schmuck diddle me. I have some compassion. I mean just because he just wants to get his wick wet, why should I let him degrade himself with such low standards as to bone a chubby like me.
Let's face it girls, when you can't see your Va jay-jay and you can't afford to have it waxed professionally, it could be a lethal weapon. Maybe I could have that survivor guy visit it. He may be able to get out alive...he's pretty resourceful. But until then it is off limits, what am I talking here? Years? Yes, years and I don't know, years, since I had hot, swinging from the ceiling, breaking the shower rod sex...thank you my hot, young X for your adventurous attitude. I only have the memories...but they are good! To tell you the truth, I am beginning to really miss it. Oh, I say I don't think about it. I am a spiritual advisor. With my meditation and stuff I should be able to control myself and feel like Mother Teresa right? Fuck it, I hope I drop 10 lbs a week on this diet...I am ready to jump back on the sex train....and I don't want stuff jiggling that isn't suppose to when I do...I must achieve non-jiggly sex before year end, I just must! With that I am going to go and think about working out and clean the kitchen. Can't wait to get started on my diet Kirstie! I just can't weight...oops, I really did type that...Freudian slip?...I think so...(Love you...) TubbyT.
A day in the life....
Just for the record, I am not able to hire a personal trainer. I have a pool I have to share with everyone in my apartment complex, in other words, not fat friendly and I don't own a treadmill. Did I mention I am not a writer? So get over the grammar glitches. (Love you...)
I do however, have a WII. You know the evil thing Kirstie hates because it tells you your OBESE? Well I do have one and I love it. So as I use Organic Liaison, which I can't afford to buy at the moment, I am using the WII. So I will post my "weigh- ins" daily here and I might even start to video them at Youtube.com keep a watch out. I will let you know if I get brave enough to go on camera.
I have been using the WII and to this point, I have lost and gained the same 1.8 lbs for the last two months. I don't know what that means but, I know I am still fat...the little voice comes on and says, "that's obese" in this cute little Alvin and the Chipmunks way. Gotta love it, I hate it. Fuck you little chipmunk voice, if I have to weigh in every friggin' day because you bitch at me when I don't, you need to save the "that's obese" and only use it once a week or so. I don't want to have to buy a new t.v.
So, my goal this week is to work out 1 hour a day. Using my various workout videos dating back to Jane Fonda Low Impact circa what? 1988-89? all the way to Slim in 6, which has been purchased paid for but never in the DVD player. I want to drink 30 oz of water a day and cut down to 1- 2 liter of pepsi a day or less.
Oh and don't judge, the reason why I am not buying my starter kit of Organic Liaison this week is because I feel strongly that I need a new phone that I can "Phitter", Twitter and Facebook with, because of course that is more important than actually starting the diet that I am Phittering, Twittering, and Facebooking about. This is me, learn to love it. I am out to clean the house and prepare to "essercise" (said in a whisper). (Love you...) TubbyTisha
I do however, have a WII. You know the evil thing Kirstie hates because it tells you your OBESE? Well I do have one and I love it. So as I use Organic Liaison, which I can't afford to buy at the moment, I am using the WII. So I will post my "weigh- ins" daily here and I might even start to video them at Youtube.com keep a watch out. I will let you know if I get brave enough to go on camera.
I have been using the WII and to this point, I have lost and gained the same 1.8 lbs for the last two months. I don't know what that means but, I know I am still fat...the little voice comes on and says, "that's obese" in this cute little Alvin and the Chipmunks way. Gotta love it, I hate it. Fuck you little chipmunk voice, if I have to weigh in every friggin' day because you bitch at me when I don't, you need to save the "that's obese" and only use it once a week or so. I don't want to have to buy a new t.v.
So, my goal this week is to work out 1 hour a day. Using my various workout videos dating back to Jane Fonda Low Impact circa what? 1988-89? all the way to Slim in 6, which has been purchased paid for but never in the DVD player. I want to drink 30 oz of water a day and cut down to 1- 2 liter of pepsi a day or less.
Oh and don't judge, the reason why I am not buying my starter kit of Organic Liaison this week is because I feel strongly that I need a new phone that I can "Phitter", Twitter and Facebook with, because of course that is more important than actually starting the diet that I am Phittering, Twittering, and Facebooking about. This is me, learn to love it. I am out to clean the house and prepare to "essercise" (said in a whisper). (Love you...) TubbyTisha
My Not So Big Life...
Ok, so, here it goes. First of all let me introduce myself. My name is Tisha and I am fat. I wasn't always fat, in fact, I thought I was kind of cute and slim. But low and behold, after a rough couple of years and thanks to Pepsi Cola...yes, when you drink 2 -2 liters a day, you will gain weight...I am now 197 lbs and miserable.
Being fat isn't fun, it isn't beautiful and it isn't empowering. It is sloppy, lazy, sweaty and just freaking gross. I don't care what anyone says, you cannot be happy and healthy mentally or otherwise if you are fat.
Enter Kirstie Alley into my Life, I don't mean she entered my life, I am not psychotic, well maybe that is a stretch, but anyway, I have never met Kirstie, but I identify with her. I used to do the club scene. In my tiny little universe, I was pretty popular. I could sing, dance and I am damn funny, more than a little crazy, I had it going on. Then I started to gain weight. I started noticing about the same time I was bitching about my weight, so was Kirstie Alley. I bought the tabloids, I watched Fat Actress and I met my new best friend. Except when Kirstie did Jenny Craig, I couldn't afford it. So as Kirstie lost the weight, I remained flat on my back talking to my clients, I am a psychic, spiritual counselor, drinking Pepsi and remaining fat. I was very disappointed that Fat Actress didn't continue and I just spiraled.
You know you are depressed when you can't remember the last time you showered, you know you did one time recently, but you can't remember. Your house is a maze of empty Pepsi two liters and you hope you remembered to brush your hair just before you enter the corner store to pick up your next two liter. I was a mess. I am still a mess, but something has occurred. Kirstie Alley is back. As I watch with my daughter and we laugh and laugh, I realize that I am not the only fat mess out there. My life while weird and lonely isn't all that different from a lot of you out there. I can lose weight. I can have friends and yes, I might even get laid one more time before I die. I will lose weight Kirstie style. Organic Liaison, here I come!
Being fat isn't fun, it isn't beautiful and it isn't empowering. It is sloppy, lazy, sweaty and just freaking gross. I don't care what anyone says, you cannot be happy and healthy mentally or otherwise if you are fat.
Enter Kirstie Alley into my Life, I don't mean she entered my life, I am not psychotic, well maybe that is a stretch, but anyway, I have never met Kirstie, but I identify with her. I used to do the club scene. In my tiny little universe, I was pretty popular. I could sing, dance and I am damn funny, more than a little crazy, I had it going on. Then I started to gain weight. I started noticing about the same time I was bitching about my weight, so was Kirstie Alley. I bought the tabloids, I watched Fat Actress and I met my new best friend. Except when Kirstie did Jenny Craig, I couldn't afford it. So as Kirstie lost the weight, I remained flat on my back talking to my clients, I am a psychic, spiritual counselor, drinking Pepsi and remaining fat. I was very disappointed that Fat Actress didn't continue and I just spiraled.
You know you are depressed when you can't remember the last time you showered, you know you did one time recently, but you can't remember. Your house is a maze of empty Pepsi two liters and you hope you remembered to brush your hair just before you enter the corner store to pick up your next two liter. I was a mess. I am still a mess, but something has occurred. Kirstie Alley is back. As I watch with my daughter and we laugh and laugh, I realize that I am not the only fat mess out there. My life while weird and lonely isn't all that different from a lot of you out there. I can lose weight. I can have friends and yes, I might even get laid one more time before I die. I will lose weight Kirstie style. Organic Liaison, here I come!
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